


unconditionally

by dontstraytoofar



Category: The Good Place (TV)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, slight angst, truly....they own me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-15
Updated: 2017-10-15
Packaged: 2019-01-17 18:08:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12371172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dontstraytoofar/pseuds/dontstraytoofar
Summary: “Tahani, you just need to walk around the party looking miserable. Great! Just like that. Perfect”Or the one where Eleanor learns to be a better soulmate.





	unconditionally

**Author's Note:**

> its 1 am and im full crying abt these two 
> 
> ps this is based in ep 5 but the last 30 seconds never happened can we all agree on that hgfdjsk

 

 

-

 

 “You know, you’re the worst soulmate”

Chidi’s staring at Eleanor as he says it, that “disappointed teacher” look that he wears, weirdly, super well. It’s like he’s somehow scrutinising Eleanor’s every move, making her feel guilty and shrink back defensively at his sudden outburst amongst the party. And wait, worst soulmate??

A unicorn trots past Eleanor as she folds her arms, she has to flick fairy dust off her top lip to look at least _slightly_ intimidating.

 “What? Where’d that come from?”

If anything, Eleanor’s blasé attitude makes Chidi frown even more. Opening his mouth in shock like a fish out of water. “ _Where’d that come from?_ Eleanor, if you hadn’t noticed, Tahani’s having a really hard time with this. Even though she knows it’s all fake, this is bringing up some real insecurities of hers”

At that, Eleanor’s face softens, her shoulders slump that slight amount, and her heart kind of hurts.

 “And you just blew her off because Michael’s having an existential crisis, which, by the way, you’re also not helping”

Eleanor bristles, because ow, blunt much?

But maybe she _needs_ blunt, maybe Eleanor needs someone to kinda just slap her over the head and tell her “hey, someone you love is hurting. Maybe get your head out of your ass for like, two seconds?” But this is Eleanor Shellstrop, and sure, she’s getting better. She’s becoming someone she would have hated back on earth (that’s a good thing, she swears). But sometimes her mouth is faster than her heart and dumb things come out, like brushing off Tahani’s feelings when in reality, Eleanor _hates_ seeing her girlfriend sad.

It like, makes her stomach drop. Or her chest constrict because someone that amazing doesn’t deserve to be sad.

(And those puppy dog eyes, forking hell)

But instead of everything she feels, the love Eleanor has for Tahani that seems to simmer constantly atop her heart; what comes out is: “Since when is it roast Eleanor day?”

Chidi drops his arms to his sides, mouth open and a disbelieving laugh leaving his lips. “Oh my god! You’re _still_ making it about you!”

Eleanor scoffs, her arms are so tightly folded at her chest she feels like she could suffocate. “You started it! You’re making it out as if I don’t care about Tahani, which, I do!”

Chidi folds his arms, shrugging. “Fine. Prove it”

Eleanor raises an eyebrow, she can feel unicorn glitter coating it.

 “So a philosophy teacher is going to make me _prove_ my love!? Even though, I shouldn’t have to? That I should have not been an inconsiderate birch and helped my soulmate because she was hurting and comforted her because I love- _oh”_ Eleanor’s voice drops at the end, realisation dawning over her face as Chidi smiles triumphantly.

She simply glares at his sunshine smile, shoving her finger in his face and scrunching her nose up.

 “I’m doing this because I love her, _not_ because you made me prove myself wrong with your dumb forking philosophy genius”

Chidi shrugs with a smile, because maybe Eleanor Shellstrop is actually learning. She’s trying, that’s all that matters. “Sure, while you’re at it, maybe you could tell her you love her for the first time?”

At that, Eleanor blushes, glares again to try and cover it up, but instead takes a glass of champaign from a passing tray and downs it in one gulp. Then takes another. And another.

Baby steps, Chidi thinks.

 

 

-

 

 

 

After looking around the party for what felt like hours, running into like three giraffes and two elephants, Eleanor eventually finds Tahani back at her mansion. Sipping wine at one of the tables, pout on her face and tears brimming her eyelids. Something in Eleanor breaks then, because wow, she _is_ the worst soulmate.

(But isn’t that the point? You have your ups and downs and maybe sometimes you aren’t always good to each other 24/7, but you love them, isn’t that enough?)

 _No,_ Eleanor thinks, _stop trying to justify it. You were the biggest forking duck._

Tahani hasn’t noticed her presence yet, she’s now leaning on the table she’s sat at with her chin resting in her palm. And even though its not the right time, Eleanor can’t help but think of how beautiful she is.

 “Is there another invite to this pity party? Or is this a one woman kinda celebration”

Tahani startles at her girlfriend’s voice, softens, then sighs as Eleanor sits next to her. Flicking a balloon across the table in a sullen manner. Eleanor sits on her hands, waiting for Tahani to speak. She has a feeling she owes that to her.

 “No. Just one darling” And Tahani then turns to her, she lets a tear roll down her cheek, she breathes in quickly and goes to wipe it away, because sometimes she hates it when people see her cry. But Eleanor stops her suddenly, taking her wrist softly in her hand and kissing her cheek; right where the tear fell.

 “I’m sorry”

At the words, Tahani blinks, her chest feels lighter and all she wants to do right now is snuggle into Eleanor’s chest. Maybe sleep for three hours straight. Instead, she lets her head rest on Eleanor’s shoulders, she sinks into the feeling of the other woman’s arm around her.

 “For being rude, inconsiderate, or mean? Or all three?”

Eleanor pouts, sighing. “I guess I deserved that one”

Tahani pulls back, she takes Eleanor’s free hand in hers and the other woman looks like Tahani is holding everything that could break her. Like she holds her heart or her soul or whatever the “Good Place” says they have, and Eleanor is looking to her like Tahani is going to snap it in half.

But she isn’t – not at all. Her own heart stutters at the thought.

 “Eleanor?”

Tahani likes how when she says her name, the other woman lights up like inside of her was this flame. A flickering light that Tahani helps keep alight in some way. She also likes how blue her eyes are, like Tahani could drown and be washed away at the same time by Eleanor’s eyes. She’s okay with that. She’s already dead.

 “Next time, and I mean this in the _nicest_ way possible my love, get your head out of your ass and pay attention?”

Eleanor laughs, and Tahani laughs back; tears still glossing her eyes. But it’s okay, she’s fine now. If fine means an aching chest, then yeah, she’s fine.

Yet in the next moment, Tahani’s pleasantly surprised, because instead of answering back with another witty line of banter, Eleanor kisses her. Softly and suddenly and with a feeling that makes Tahani close her eyes, and smile tearfully into the kiss.

 “What was that for?”

And Eleanor pulls back, biting her lip, and she squeezes to the hand in hers; because Tahani _needs_ to know this. Eleanor feels like she’ll combust if she doesn’t say it.

 “When I was six, my mum used to iron my hair for when people came over because she didn’t want to buy me a straightener I had wanted for ages for my birthday,” Tahani frowns, but Eleanor gives her a look of “ _trust me this is going somewhere”_

 “So I’d get third degree burns on my forehead like, every week. But I’d always hear about other kids parents getting stuff for them, ya know? Chidi says it’s the phycology of maternal and paternal figures and blah blah blah. But for me? I think it’s unconditional love. And well, it hurts a little knowing you didn’t get that as a kid when you should have. That your parents didn’t love you like they were supposed to”

(At that, fresh tears spring to Tahani’s eyes at her girlfriend’s words, because she understands in a way that makes her fall in love with Eleanor even more)

 “But then _you_ came along” Eleanor smiles, her words croak a bit, like emotions she’s never felt are bubbling up her throat and making her stutter. “You came along and gave me that. You just radiate this _love_ , like when you get up earlier than me you make me coffee without asking or I’d always find my flannels folded on the bed because you know I hate creases or how you forking unconditionally put up with my dumb behaviour that I _super_ regret because-“

Eleanor takes a breath, and Tahani’s crying now. But she’s smiling, she feels okay again.

 “Because you’re amazing. And you should never doubt your worth, or your awesome party planning. And I’m sorry for being the worst soulmate in existence”

Eleanor takes another deep breath, and Tahani bites her lip. She doesn’t think she’s loved anyone as much as she does right now. Tahani feels like she can’t breathe.

So she kisses Eleanor, letting her hand trail to her jaw, to the back of her neck. Gripping slightly and pulling her ever closer into the kiss. Trying to say what she can’t into the kiss. And Eleanor gasps into it, like she knows what Tahani’s feeling.

There’s so many things she wants to say, so many words at her tongue that yearn to escape. But maybe that’s for another night, maybe two love confessions for one day is enough. So instead, Tahani pulls back, speaking against Eleanor’s lips.

 “There’s helium in these balloons. Do you know what this means?”

And Eleanor laughs, because she just basically confessed her love to her but Tahani knows her so well that of _forking course_ she knows what that means.

 “We get to get high on helium and talk like chipmunks!?”

(And they do. They end up on the floor, sucking in the balloons and laughing into each other. Eleanor ends up with her head on Tahani’s stomach, she likes how her laugh sounds and she likes how Tahani unconditionally loves her)

Eleanor unconditionally loves her too.

 

-


End file.
